(no subject)

Jun. 12th, 2025 11:45 pm
dani_meows: (disney: aristocats)
[personal profile] dani_meows


Jasper is currently resting comfortably with me checking on him frequently to make sure he doesn't scratch his eye area or need anything. In exchange he doesn't have to wear the cone.

So far he's being a real trooper about it just like last time. I really do think cats understand English and he understood my explanations of what was happening.

The opthalmologist took out everything they could and hopefully the biopsy will show the cancer not all the way through the removed tissue.

Ian gets paid in ten minutes so we don't have to worry about not having enough money for groceries/expenses after that.

The above picture is of Jasper at our vet the day we went to understand his diagnosis.

Besides Jasper I've mostly been reading fanfiction and making sure the other three cats aren't jealous of the attention Jasper's getting.

The headache I've had for days is getting better. And I'm glad the cancer cells are hopefully out of my cat.

Three weeks or so we should know for sure.

Which will put us in July. Hopefully after the anniversary of the cat who's death still feels fresh rather than almost a year ago.

Anyway Jasper is asleep and safe for now. I'm going to go back to reading fanfiction mostly about Harry Potter being raised by his godfather. Sometimes with manipulative Dumbledore... They are my weakness.

(no subject)

Jun. 12th, 2025 01:24 am
dani_meows: (Default)
[personal profile] dani_meows
Jasper's surgery is in six hours.

I am a mess of anxiety.

We won't know until about 3 weeks or so if this time they got all of it. Last time they didn't know it was cancerous and the cancer was all the way into the margins.

I hope they can get the cancer out. I hope he'll forgive us for putting him through another surgery.

I hope he won't stop cuddling me or purring on my shoulder while nesting onto my boobs for a nap.
usuallyhats: The four ghostbusters heading into battle (ghostbusters into battle)
[personal profile] usuallyhats
The Sapling Cage - Margaret Killjoy
The Butterfly Assassin - Finn Longman
Lake of Souls - Ann Leckie
A Sorceress Comes to Call - T Kingfisher
James - Percival Everett
Those Beyond the Wall - Micaiah Johnson
The Dead Cat Tail Assassins - P Djèlí Clark
The City in Glass - Nghi Vo
Return of the Thief - Megan Whalen Turner
The Brides of High Hill - Nghi Vo
The Practice, the Horizon and the Chain - Sofia Samatar
Navigational Entanglements - Aliette de Bodard

The West Passage - Jared Pechaček
Metropolitain: An Ode to the Paris Metro - Andrew Martin
We Called Them Giants
The Hunger and the Dusk, vol 1
Saint Death's Herald - CSE Cooney
The Butcher of the Forest - Premee Mohamed
The Raven Scholar - Antonia Hodgson
In Universes - Emet North
So Let Them Burn - Kamilah Cole
The Time of the Ghost - Diana Wynne Jones
The Gentleman and His Vowsmith - Rebecca Ide
The Magicians of Caprona - Diana Wynne Jones

The Sapling Cage (three stars), A Sorceress Comes to Call (two stars), The City in Glass (five stars), The West Passage (five stars), Saint Death's Herald (three stars), The Raven Scholar (three stars), The Gentleman and His Vowsmith (two stars)The Sapling Cage
This took me a bit to get into, partly because I was struggling to get a handle on the world, but it picks up once Lorel joins the witches, and has some really interesting stuff on duty, responsibility, power and how to live in a world that has other people in it. I felt like it faltered a bit in the second half when the action picked up, though, partly because it stopped addressing those questions and partly because writing action scenes is not Killjoy's best skill - they're not bad, exactly, but they are a bit awkward. And while I see what the author was trying to do with the denouement and the villain's motivation, it just didn't really come off.

What did work really well, however, was Lorel's debate on whether she wanted use magic to transform her body because she wanted a different body, or because having that body would make it easier for her to exist in a transphobic world. I particularly liked that it doesn't really factor into her internal debate that the magic to make it happen is difficult and painful and needs the participation of another person: she can tackle how to get it if she decides it's something she wants.

So definitely a mixed bag: the aspects of it I loved, I REALLY loved, but I'm still on the fence about whether I'll read the next in the trilogy.

A Sorceress Comes to Call
Two stars is probably a little ungenerous, but I was so frustrated by this book by the time I finished it, because it's two books, and they're both good books, but they are fighting each other. Part of this book is an incredibly well done horror novel about domestic abuse and control, and part of it is a delightful Regencyesque comedy of manners, and maybe those two things could mesh, but they don't here: the comedy of manners defangs the horror novel, and the horror makes the comedy of manners feel frivolous, even though both taken individually are great.

I could also have done without the comedy of manners heroine banging on about how OLD and DECREPIT she is, she's just SO ANCIENT, an OLD LADY, when she is in fact... fifty one. (Definitely a known problem with Kingfisher's writing, and this is at least older than her previous "I'm just SO OLD" heroine was, so... progress?)

The City in Glass
Absolutely loved this. Gorgeous prose, incredible images, wildly compelling - Nghi Vo does not miss.

The West Passage
This book was a wild ride and I had a great time (even if it contains slightly more cannibalism than I would ideally prefer). It's a medieval inspired fantasy, but not in a knights and peasants way, in a mysticism and weird little guys from the margins of illuminated manuscripts way: there's definitely some Gormenghast in its DNA, as well as some of the odder corners of Arthuriana, but it is absolutely its own thing. And the ending absolutely elevated the whole thing.

Saint Death's Herald
I absolutely adored Saint Death's Daughter, but this sequel didn't work as well for me. I still love Lanie, but the new supporting cast and their relationships with her weren't as strong as the previous books, so I was a lot less invested overall (especially in the incredibly drawn out fight sequence around the 60% mark), and the more peripatetic plot meant there was less of a sense of place to this one. I also felt like the prose leaned into the elements that I liked less from the previous book. I didn't dislike it, though, and I'm hoping this is just a touch of middle-book-itis (it did feel like there was a lot of mopping up from book one and manoeuvring into position for book three) - I will definitely be finishing the trilogy.

The Raven Scholar
Definitely a three stars (affectionate) here. I loved the middle of this book, as our (not stated but very obviously) autistic heroine navigates the situation she's been flung into and grapples with her own past choices, but the beginning was a bit rocky and I felt like the end collapsed down a lot of interesting complexities in the interests of having a more standard Villain Plot to defeat. It's a very long book, though, so I spent more time in the fun middle than the shaky beginning and end, and am excited for more in this world!

The Gentleman and His Vowsmith
I feel like this book couldn't quite decide what it wanted to be. It tried to be a romance, a fantasy novel, a murder mystery and a gothic novel all at once, and ended up not really doing justice to any of them. And while it's definitely possible for this kind of genre mishmash to work, it has to be better integrated into the whole; here it felt like we were just skipping from one to the other, and as a result none of them were managed in a completely satisfying way - I forgot who the murderer was almost immediately after it was revealed, for example, because the solution was such a damp squib. The dialogue in particular also couldn't decide if it wanted to be period or modern, and overall it felt it was never sure if it wanted to be Regency-with-magic or full AU.

I do think that all of those things would have been easier to overlook if it had been shorter and faster paced though, it did have some fun stuff going on, but its flaws got more evident and more frustrating the more I read.

(no subject)

Jun. 9th, 2025 11:05 pm
dani_meows: (47 and Diana: I choose him/we had trust)
[personal profile] dani_meows
I am so anxious today. My chest hurts. My tongue is numb.

I have a valid reason for my anxiety. Jasper's surgery is soon. This Thursday. I am so afraid. I regret Miso's surgery last year. Even though it was the best chance we had of him living to see six years of age. Unfortunately he was one of ten percent of cats who don't survive multiple urinary tract blockage followed by PU surgery.

This is a different thing but in some ways it's the same. Money is tight. The cat is ill and it all comes down to this treatment.

I also feel bad they have to open the healed area to reopen it. But even if they'd found it earlier we would have had to wait because cats should not go under more than once in a month.

Especially a senior boy with kidney disease.

I want to believe they will successfully remove all the melanoma cells. That they will be successful.

That a few weeks from now I'll be blogging about something random maybe my thoughts on anime or books or literally anything with Jazzy beside me like he is right now. Nori and Boo next to him. My three cat boys having a sleep while their sister plots world domination for endless supplies of ice cream and macaroni noodles.

But I'm scared. Is it my anxiety disorder? Maybe yes? Maybe no.

(no subject)

Jun. 9th, 2025 01:35 am
dani_meows: (hobbitverse: I don't like green food)
[personal profile] dani_meows
I'm finally caught up on comments!

Let's see:

Jasper has surgery on Thursday to hopefully remove the rest of the melanoma which hopefully isn't spreading elsewhere. The lab gave it a 20 percent chance of moving elsewhere. But then again the biopsy was an abundance of caution from the optometrist vet and only had a 15 percent or so chance of being cancerous.

Poor Jasper and I.

He's been in good spirits. His weight is back up but we'd like it if he'd gain a pound. He's a thin mint. He's been curling up and cuddling more since we had to evacuate in October because of hurricane Milton and that trend has continued. No hard feelings from the first surgery and that will hopefully continue with this second one.

I'm preparing for his surgery by trying to change my sleeping schedule so someone is with Jasper at all times. Ian doesn't have off work this time so it'll be a little trickier but thankfully he works from home.

Thinking about making a play pen type thing for him because he's unsteady and frail without meds but becomes extra unsteady on meds.

I got my birthday presents in the mail, and have happily enjoyed the manga for nichijou,
and looking forward to reading the two history books.

Spent some time playing dreamlight valley. Love the Cheshire cat!

I really need some new media my muse is pretty much dead.

Saw the gif of Billie Piper becoming the Doctor it's shame Doctor Who sucks and makes no sense otherwise I would be incoherent with delight. Love me some Billie Piper and in the hands of someone wanting to tell a good story you could do interesting things with that.

I think I'd pick a point and have the Timeless Child be a trap by the Master because that whole thing started the convoluted nonsense that is currently canon. Plus the Master being endlessly tortured as a child in order to have regenerations stolen from him would have made more sense. Given some depth to his crazy. A reason for him to destroy everything.

But supposedly it's cancelled.

Afraid to look at my friends page. Tumblr has been full of people lately that are cool with parroting terrorists phrases being cool with people being killed for being Jewish. I have blocked so soooo many people.

a brief buy joyous update

Jun. 7th, 2025 07:59 pm
marina: (Erik's got his helmet on)
[personal profile] marina
Welp, I've started a new job! It has happened!

boring financial things )

*

I've only had 1 day of work at the new place, due to holidays and the fact that I was sick for the past 10 days (boo!!!) and asked to postpone my start date by a few days.

But it definitely feels like a level of fancy tech that I've never personally experienced before, with an actual HR department that made sure I'd have all my equipment ready for me on the first day, and a little welcome sign, and some company merch.

There are things I definitely haven't figured out yet, like how to best get to the office to deal with my disability/health issues, especially considering the fact that the laptop I got is much heavier than anticipated (my previous company replaced some of the laptops shortly after I joined and I managed to get in on the deal and get a really great, light computer).

The office itself is really nice, even though the building is sadly in the middle of a construction zone. My previous work was in an extremely central downtown area where you were close to a bunch of greenery and shops and restaurants. This place is tragically kind of isolated in a sea of dust and hazard signs.

I haven't figured out the dynamics of my team/department/org so much yet, but everyone I've met has been nice, and my boss seems to be a pretty great guy, according to reports. He's also been nothing but kind and respectful towards me.

So, overall first day was pretty overwhelming but nice. Tomorrow will be my first day of work-from-home, and I plan to spend most of it reading a ton of documents. And then Tuesday we're having some kind of all-day workshop for the entire team that means I'll need to get super early to the office, even though the workshop will be virtual. But you know, if it wasn't literally my first week I might find a more sensible way to do it, but since I'm extremely new and this seems to be the expectation, I'll be there with bells on lol.

Jazzy update

Jun. 6th, 2025 03:36 pm
dani_meows: (cats: kitten cute)
[personal profile] dani_meows
So we went to the vet on Wednesday to discuss Jasper's whole health with our primary vet. We trust him a lot because he's been our vet for 13 plus years now.

Our vet said that with Jasper's kidney disease (early stage 1) he wouldn't recommend going to an oncologist for treatments as both radiation and chemo may put to much strain on our boys kidneys.

He sent an email to our optometrist who did Jasper's surgery about the risks of going in again to try and remove the additional melanoma cells. And got back to us that day recommending the surgery to hopefully be able to remove the additional melanoma.

Apparently diffuse iris melanoma doesn't grow back often and it's risk of moving elsewhere is also low.

So next Thursday, Jasper goes back in for surgery.

Hopefully they can save him.

I want to have hope. I'm never ready to say goodbye to my cats. And I want Jasper to live as long as he can. To beat kidney disease and Cancer for as long as possible.

At the vet's office I also got to meet a five week old kitten, that our vet rescued! Omg she was the tiniest little thing.

Jasper than bit me in jealousy! I have my hands full with Jasper, Boo, Bitsy and Nori though!

(no subject)

Jun. 3rd, 2025 07:10 pm
dani_meows: (Default)
[personal profile] dani_meows
Made an appointment to discuss Jasper's future with our vet. So tomorrow I'll know if he gets treatment or if the cancer is such that it'll be time to give my old man cat hospice cat.

Ob July 7th it'll be a year since my five year old cat passed away too.

I'm hoping that it's treatable but the fact that the eye removal didn't contain all of the mass that did turn out cancerous.

I'm not expecting good news.

(no subject)

Jun. 2nd, 2025 01:58 pm
dani_meows: (Default)
[personal profile] dani_meows
Jasper's biopsy results came in

He has melanoma. The sample in the lab showed they didn't get it all.

Don't know what we can afford. Still hurting after Miso's surgery not even a year ago that cost 7k.

Jasper also has kidney disease so...

Waiting to see what our primary vet says.

But I'm not certain how much fight we can do.

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